Bella Toscana…..Part 17......What Next?

In recent weeks I have made some pretty major decisions. With life now coming to an end here at the Villa in Tuscany. My thoughts are beginning to turn to ‘What next?’ With the decision to not return to the Villa made and set in concrete after a little doubt at saying no to yet another amazing season in my beautiful life here in Italy. And with the ski season looming, come December where I will yet again find myself in the chaotic throws of working as a chef within a buzzing French chalet.

My thoughts have turned to the next big dream. The next adventure to chase. The goal I have been harbouring for many months, possibly years. Actually it’s hard to remember when the first glimmer of hope for this dream was ignited within me because I think its just always been there. Having been brought up immersed in the marine lifestyle and spending years of my life on boats I have always loved the nautical life. And now with my developing passion for cooking and need to continue to explore and travel I have decided to begin the process of trying to crack the super yacht industry. Big, white, shiny, floating boats are what I now find myself dreaming about! Cruising the Mediterranean and exploring Italian and French ports are what my thoughts are filled with these days!

While some of you will have no idea what I am talking about, a super yacht is a boat reaching more than 24 meters in length and can either be a motor or sailing vessel. They are the boats you see in ports such as Monaco and Portofino which everyone walks past in envy and wonders who on earth could own such a beautiful thing and lead such an amazing lifestyle! The privately owned or chartered monster boats all equipped with their own spa’s, private masseurs and jet skis hidden perfectly within the hull are what I am hoping to call home for a summer of Mediterranean port hopping!

I know most of you by now are thinking…..”Is she ever going to come home?” I can honestly say the answer to that question is, ‘Yes, but just not yet!’ I am not ready to find my Australian shores just yet. There are more adventures for me to be had in Europe. Although over the last few months I had been planning and looking forward to coming home for a month or two next year, I have decided to put my need for a dose of Australia on hold until I actualise another of my dreams.

So I am booked in for 11 days of intensive yachting courses on the French Riviera at the end of November, gaining certificates and meeting and greeting agencies in the hope of securing a position on an esteemed super yacht next summer. It is an extremely hard industry to crack, with jobs high in demand and networking being imperative I am hoping I can pull it off. All I can say is, the yachting industry better watch out because you all know what happens when Kim makes up her mind to do something, when she wants something badly enough…..She gets it! So let’s hope I can pull this one off and make the next dream a reality.

Bella Toscana…..Part 16.....My Italian-ness

One of the most amazing experiences about spending extended periods of time in places of your heritage means that parts of yourself which correlate to that heritage begin to appear and become understood. Being in Italy I now understand that there are parts to my psyche and nature that are distinctively Italian. Traits of my Sicilian bloodline that have been passed onto me and now allowed to develop and be nurtured due to spending time amongst the chaotic brilliance of my heritage.

As a child, my Australian upbringing taught me to be capable, dependable, reliable, determined, responsible, the most organised and efficient. And I am proud to say that I am all of those things which fit perfectly into the organised world of Australia but here in Italy none of those things seem to matter and the true essence of my Italian-ness has been allowed to shine through.

When you spend enough time in a place where you are able to spend time with the locals watching and observing their traits and daily habits you’re all of a sudden able to see that some of these traits and habits are actually mirrored in your own personality and daily life and you are able to understand yourself on a much deeper level. Like being able to understand every layer of the onion, right to its core.

My love of cooking, along with my motherly, generous nature and strong family values have all been reflected back to me here in Italy. I now understand why I drive like an Italian and why my big bum and thighs are going to be with me for life! Here I don’t feel ashamed of my Sicilian hot blooded stubbornness, but rather pleased to have it alongside me as a useful tool when dealing with contradicting Italians.

I have sat and observed Italians chop and change their minds at will. Swapping between one truth to the next when it pleases them. Always believing they are of course in the right without a doubt in their minds. Which only makes my opinionated and ever changing mind feel free to exercise itself fully here in Italy.

I now understand why I instinctively care about feeding people and making sure that their tummies are well fed as a way of showing my love and care for people. Just as my Nonna did for me, I too realise that my love for cooking and passion while working in the kitchen comes out of wanting to care for people. Feeding people is just what I do and no one bats an eyelid at that here. In fact it’s completely natural and normal.

And although I am not proud to admit this trait, I do love a gossip just as the Italian men and women do. It’s a well known fact within Italian communities that any ones business soon becomes every ones business. Give an Italian a couple of hours and he or she can spread the news all over the world faster than the world media could! Here gossiping is a way of life, something to do, to pass the time. As you pass the old men sitting out the front of the local bar or the women perched on their balconies overlooking the happenings of the village below we all know how they are passing the time in conversation!

Bella Toscana…..Part 15.....Mia Sicilia

This is a little chapter dedicated to one of those incidences where life takes you down an unexpected path and sets in motion a series of thoughts which changes your life yet again. I found myself venturing into a book store in Florence as I waited for friends to finish their tour of the Acadaemia. And as I arrived at the small English section, the title of a book ‘The Sicilian Kitchen,’ caught my attention. I was hooked by the images of the cover and hearing myself read that word aloud in my mind “Sicilian” I was immediately transported to the place in my heart where I long to be. My heart skipped a beat and I felt like I was home. The place which my Sicilian grandparents instilled a deep passion and love for their country in me.

I found a seat on the steps of the book store and devoured the book for over an hour. Reading page after page and realising that it was Sicily that I came to Italy for. And yet I hadn’t got there. I had been caught in Northern Italy, within the intoxicating life of Toscana.

Deep down as I keep thinking of my time coming to an end in Italy, I realise I have unfinished business with this country. And maybe I always will. It now feels like home to me, just as much as my beloved Australia. When I came to Italy I had longed to see and embrace my Sicily that I had grown up knowing in my heart. And now all I can think of is my return, and this time my destination will be Sicily.

Bella Toscana…..Part 14......Italian Time!

They say heaven is where the cars are German, the lovers French, the Police English, the cooks Italian, and all organised by the Swiss. And they say hell is where the police are German, the lovers Swiss, the cooks English, the mechanics French and all organised by the Italians! Given the recent events I have witnessed here in Italy I could not agree with this statement more!

As Verity, Carla, Sam and I all ventured into Castellina, expecting a leisurely afternoon in our local town, watching Harvey and his school music class perform their orchestra for the year, we were all hoping with bated breathe that the Italians would pull it off this time….

Harvey and his class mates had been practicing for months, learning their musical notes at a painstakingly slow rate. Although we were quite horrified to hear that Harvey had only learnt three notes by the end of the semester and even more troubled by the idea that we would be turning up to a concert where the children only had three notes in their repertoire to play with!

And in true Italian fashion, just as we all had hoped wouldn’t happen, the Italians made a complete shambles of the whole affair! Not that the Italians seem to mind or even notice of course! But as Verity, Carla, Sam and I waited patiently in our seats for something to happen, it quite simply didn’t!

As we sat patiently in our seats, having arrived timely to allow plenty of time for Harvey to organise himself amongst his class mates and calm his nerves we were quite perplexed to find that nothing had been set up in the concert hall with only half an hour before the concert was supposed to begin.

As I turned to Verity, with one of those looks that we give each other when we realise what we have got our selves into, yet again, she said quite fittingly “Italians couldn’t organise a piss up in a brewery, even if they tried!” The thing is I am sure they could, but it would just take weeks of organising and 20 odd people arguing about where the tables and kegs should go before anything actually got done or any beer was actually drank!

So as we somewhat impatiently sat in our seats watching as the Italians got to work trying to set up PA systems and all the important electrical equipment needed to put on such an extravaganza, we yet again felt cheated and annoyed that our precious Sunday afternoon had been wasted on ‘Italian time’! With the concert starting two hours after the so called scheduled start time, we painstakingly endured a procession of songs consisting of the three musical notes which the school children had learnt, with trumpets and violins being played in typically poorly fashion, all sounding like a hungry cat had just been let out in a bird cage! But of course, we endured all of this with a smile on our faces to make sure Harvey was allowed that sense of achievement which all children crave from such special events.

It’s these kind of experiences that really do make we wonder how anything gets done in this country, but also why I love it so much. Truthfully I actually loved siting and watching as the chaos of the Italianess unfolded in front of my eyes. The passionate yet laid back attitude of Italians may be incredibly frustrating at times but maybe we should all take a leaf out of the Italians book. Maybe we would all be better off for a siesta every now and then and a carefree approach to time.

Bella Toscana…..Part 13…..The Intrepid adventures of Kevin

By far one of the most memorable experiences of this past summer has been the intrepid adventures of Kevin! And if most of you are wondering what on earth I am talking about, let me explain. Kevin is a campervan! Who was bought by three of my Australian friends and so named after Kevin Rudd, the Australian Prime Minister! Who recently gave all Australian citizens of a certain age AU$900! So Ben, Mark and Lachy all decided to use their Kevin Rudd issued surplus money in Europe and bought a Campervan with their hard earned Australian cash! And of course decided to name their campervan after the person who had actually paid for it! Kevin!

The boys whom I know from my High School Padua College days left Australia in June and had already travelled through Spain, Andorra, Norway and France before they headed towards me in Italy.
The Palio was to be the event for our rendezvous. So as the boys arrived just in the nick of time to see the second famous Palio horse race of the year I was able to spend time with some Australian friends and join the adventures of Kevin for two weeks in August as the boys and Beth (Lachy’s university friend) explored Tuscany and surrounding areas.

Again I quickly assumed the tour guide role and was all too happy to show the boys and Beth around the area I now know all to well. I was able to show them around the Villa and surrounding local areas which have become my regular haunts such as Siena and Florence.

So the Tuscan leg of ‘The adventures of Kevin’ go something like this….

The Palio
Ben, Mark, Lachy, Beth and I all found ourselves standing in the scorching summer heat of the Piazza Del Campo in Siena to secure our spot to watch the oldest of Italian traditions. A horse race in which the riders and horses of neighbouring contrada’s of Siena race bareback around the Campo for three hot laps. The rivalry between the contrada’s and the atmosphere which is created in Siena due to this medieval tradition is just amazing and something which should simply not be missed. And as the horses raced around the campo for their three short laps after hours of waiting for the race to actually begin, Siena erupted into a frenzy of celebrations. The Boys, Beth and I soaked up the atmosphere during this time by joining the partying in the streets with the winning contrada. Watching as the horse, jockey and winning flags were paraded around the streets of Siena with a chorus of drummers and singers chanting the winning ‘Civetta’ song. I can honestly say that the Palio has been the highlight of my time in Tuscany and something that I am proud to say I have experienced with such amazing friends.

Florence and some new Irish Friends!
Next we decided to venture to Florence for glimpses of the city renowned for its renaissance art. Unfortunately we seemed to descend on Florence just as the hottest days of this summer descended on Tuscany, which unfortunately for us made the streets of Florence almost unbearable during the day. But as we ventured into the city as the sun went down and the temperatures receded to levels which meant you could walk in a constant clammy stickiness without the possibility of heat stroke, I was able to show the boys and Beth some of the sights. Florence is such a gorgeous city by night and is buzzing with life. So as we headed into a bar filled to the brim with local Italians we were surprised to be met by some Irish barristers standing at the bar drinking cocktails. Now I know most of you won’t believe a word of this story; I find it hard to believe that this part of the adventures of Kevin actually happened, that is why I have to write it down, because then maybe I can begin to believe it myself.

By the end of the night we had made ourselves some new Irish friends and somehow found ourselves thanks to my helpful local knowledge invited out to lunch the next day, with the bill all on them!
Naturally the next morning when we all woke and realised that the state of our conversations the previous night might not have held much weight when weighed up against the severity of our hangovers we were all surprised to find messages on our phones from our Irish friends, Richard and Adrian still wanting us to meet them for dinner that night. I had suggested they visit one of my favourite Tuscan restaurants, set in one of the most amazing Tuscan hilltop towns called Lamole. It is by far and away my favourite restaurant in all of Tuscany and I am now famous there due to the amount of time I have spent on their terrace. So for the simple act of being the local and offering a place to eat for these lovely Irish barristers we all found ourselves invited out for dinner. Although most of us were finding it hard to understand why some 50 year old Irish barristers would want to invite four aussie travellers out for an all expenses paid dinner, we were naturally a little reluctant and doubtful that we weren’t just being taken for a ride and that this was all some sort of joke. But true to their word, they arrived at the restaurant and we sat and enjoyed a lovely three course meal with amazing views, great company and all wine and food paid for by these generous chaps. Amazing! I still can’t quite believe it happened.

When we quizzed Richard and Adrian about their motives for offering us utter strangers to a beautiful free meal we were quite taken back and humbled to find that the reason they had offered this good deed to us was in summary actually there way of making sure that the same similar deed that they were offered as penniless travellers when they were young was allowed to continue in this world. We learnt when Richard found himself in Europe with literally only the exact amount of money it was going to cost him to catch the train to the airport for his flight home plus one extra dollar he was offered a wonderful deed by some relative strangers who decided to give him one last night out in Europe and treated him to a glorious meal and drinks. And it was this deed that sparked the notion that Richard, now a successful barrister should return back to other penniless travellers! There is good in this world after all and how surprising and humbling it is to find that we now find ourselves with that same debt to repay to other young travellers someday….

Cinque Terre
Next on the list of adventures to be had was a visit to the Cinque Terre. After the boys (minus Lachy who had gone off to Norway in search of Love!), Beth and I had cooked a meal for guests at the Villa we all piled into Kevin yet again and headed north to the Cinque Terre where we spent lazy hot summer days lying on sun warmed right next to the Mediterranean sea. With not a care in the world we passed the time dosing on the warm rocks and diving in the sea to view the amazing sea life surrounding us in the crystal clear blue water. It was bliss! And of course, when in Cinque Terre….The famous walk must be accomplished. So on a 35+ degree day we headed along the beautiful coastline and walked the miles of path carved out between the five towns of the Cinque Terre. Some perfect days, which now form perfect memories.

The Adventures Part 2
The boys and Beth left me in late August, after two weeks of intrepid adventures around Tuscany but it wasn’t long before I was able to rejoin the fun times. Come mid-September as Mark and Ben (with Lachy and Beth having moved onto Turkey) docked back into the Italian coastline after their ‘mad’ boat cruise in Croatia I was once again able to meet up with them and come along for the Modena/Venice leg of their travels.

What’s red, shiny, fast and is sin ominous with a little red pony?
But first, the boys had a ‘once in a lifetime’ box to tick so I met the boys in Modena and headed in the direction of the land of red, shiny, fast things! The Ferrari factory and museum! Heaven in any car lovers eyes! Ben and Mark both turned into little school kids at the museum and then turned into mid-life crisis middle aged old men when they paid for the privilege of driving an actual Ferrari around the Italian roads of the Ferrari factory! A 15 minute spin in a Ferrari was enough to make these boys talk absolute gibberish for the next 48 hours! With all the horsepower of a Ferrari at their fingertips they paced their way around the factory at amateur like speeds of 180km speeds in second gear! Not bad boys!

And then…..Venice
Next, the adventures of Kevin took us to the beautiful canals and ponte of Venice. By far and away, without any doubt, my favourite place on this earth! My return to her shores allowed me to once again breathe along with her tides and feel the vibration which this beautiful city resonates at. Visits once again to the islands of Murano, Lido and St Marks Square confirmed my love for La serenissima. Gondola rides with friends through the canals along with dinners in local squares have all been added to my bank of precious Venice moments.

Sad farewells
I was incredibly sad when my aussie friends had to move on and continue their adventures in other parts of Europe. Having friends here with me in this new life I have created in Europe solidified what I miss the most about my life in Australia. Although meeting new people is something I enjoy on a daily basis, it was a refreshing change to be able to be myself and slip straight back into a familiar setting. Nothing can replace the lifelong friends we make throughout our lives, especially those whom know us better than others. It was wonderful to be surrounded by people who already knew me. To not have to go through conversation after conversation about past histories and life summaries. To simply just be understood immediately by my already established friends almost felt like a shock to the system and I made sure I soaked up every minute of it. I loved the ease at being able to chat so idly about mutual friends and moments we had shared in our lives in Australia. Being miles away from friends and family and spending extended periods of time with strangers surrounding your every move can be one of the loneliest experiences of the traveller lifestyle, so it was with great sadness that I farewelled the adventures of Kevin from my life. But with great admiration that some of my best friends in this world came to share such an incredible period of their lives with me. The bonds which they are creating due to their pilgrimage together in my opinion is truly inspirational and something which I envy but am grateful for having been a part of for a brief period of time. Thanks guys!

Bella Toscana…..Part 12…..When in Rome…..

I am glad to report after 25 and a half years of never tasting a single drop of coffee, in celebration of Mel’s presence with me in Italy I have ticked a ‘must do in Italy’ criterion off my list and had my first ever cup off coffee!! It had to happen. When in Italy…..right?

The lack of coffee in my life never came about for any particular reason. I grew up in an Italian family with the familiar flavour and smell of coffee flowing through my veins in a manner of speaking but never literally. The actual habit of drinking coffee was just something I seemed to skip. Some even found it a small feet on my behalf that I survived 4 years of an intense university degree without a single drop of the miracle concentration cup!

But as Mel and I visited a small Tuscan village and sat down in a quaint little cafe on the small main street I saluted Mel’s European holiday and our Italian reunion with a beautifully warming glass filled with the most delicious aromatic Caffe Latte! It was perfect! My first taste of the deliciously warming flavour of coffee.

I now understand what all the fuss is about!! I love the strong flavour of the espresso which lingers in your mouth long after the coffee has been digested. But I equally love the milky warmth of the milk which makes the experience last longer in a Caffe Latte. Oh decisions, decisions!

So now begins the coffee drinking habit within the Italian travels of the kimba chronicles. And haven’t I chosen one of the best, if not the best country to begin this habit in! You will now know where to find me....standing at the bar, espresso in hand, doing things the Italian way!

Bella Toscana…..Part 11…..Surprises in August and an unexpected September

Suddenly it is October and I am now in my final days here at the Villa. I find myself reminiscing about the summer been and gone and wondering where on earth August or September went. I am sure the days are imprinted somewhere in my memory, slurred together with the sleep deprivation and days of running around like a crazed lunatic trying to get everything done at the Villa while looking after Sam and all the guests, along with the multitude of friends I have had come and visit me here in the last couple of months.

August was supposed to be one of my quietest months here at the Villa. And if I am honest I was actually quite looking forward to having nothing but siesta and writing to look forward to each day. I had begun writing and compiling my own recipe book and I had set myself a target back in July of having it completed by the last day of August! Well, now that that date has been and gone, I am quite perplexed as to how my August turned into one of the busiest months for me here at the Villa. And unfortunately for my recipe book, a new deadline has had to be drawn, although I don’t hold out much hope for its success either unfortunately. Maybe one day!

September also seems to have become a blimp on my memory. As Sam begun nursery, Verity was told under no uncertain terms to put her feet up and not lift a finger! In the final weeks of her pregnancy, life for me at the Villa took on a different view. No longer did I have Sam attached to my conscious, I now had the inner workings of the Villa to handle and take care of. Verity and I literally swapped jobs! Which left me with the cleaning, cooking and guest related palaver to deal with.

And now as I sit here today, in the crisp days of October, with autumn all around me, summer is now beginning to feel like a distant memory. The debilitating heat of those hot July and August days are beginning to recede from my memory. And as the change of season is upon us, the familiar taste of leaving is on my tongue yet again. My mouth now used to the taste of travel is gearing up for the ski season ahead and all the adventures the slopes will have in store for me this winter.

But before I delve into what the future may hold for me I will take you back to August and try to fill you in on what I have been up to during these hot Tuscan summer days.

Well life seemed to kick into a higher gear for me in August. We had weddings and many many guests making their way down our long winding driveway, which was great as well as very stressful. But to make all of that more enjoyable I am pleased to report I almost didn’t spend a day without friends here with me in August. First to make the pilgrimage to visit me was my gutsy Vaujany roommate Sophie, who had been working as an au pair in the south of France. Her linguistic skills have put me to shame and she is now fluent in French having lived with a French family for the last 6 months. Sophie stayed with me for 5 nights during one of the busiest weeks here this season. She arrived smack bang in the middle of one of our wedding weeks here at the Villa. She helped Verity and I prepare and serve all the catering for the wedding reception and was instrumental in helping us get everything organised. Thanks Sophie!

August also happened to bring the ski season to visit me here in Tuscany. As I was lucky enough to have Ex-KickSki guests come and stay at the Villa for 2 whole weeks! Sue and Gary with their adorable boys, Fergus and James and parents Tony and Carol became part of the background here in early August, just as they did in Vaujany after they spent a full month in resort! It was lovely to have my skiing family back again and to be able to chat away about skiing constantly with them over bottles of vino and games of cards. I was sad to see them leave but I have promised to make it out to Dubai for a visit on my way back to Oz…whenever that may be!

Next was my lovely friend from Devon who came to surprise me. Unbeknown to me she and her partner had booked into the Villa under a different name as a disguise. Last year I had surprised her by secretly arranging a holiday with her family in Spain, so this year she got me back! And what a lovely surprise it was. She and her partner, Mikey stayed for 4 nights and we picked up our friendship where we had left it months ago back when I was in Devon at the end of last year. Sarah is like family to me here in Europe and I always cherish the time we get to spend with each other. So thank you once again Sarah for my wonderful surprise. My turn now!

Come September I had even more friends to look forward to. My little pad, herby cottage was fast becoming the famed haunt for many of my friends who wanted to escape the UK summer. Although most of my friends say their reason for visiting was to spend time with me I secretly suspect that something about my alluring Italian destination which I call home may have had something to do with it! But do you see me complaining? Nope! I am just ever so grateful to be able to have friends come and visit me here at the Villa. I can honestly say that my life here in Europe now feels far more complete than it did last year, purely for the fact that I now know I have friends dotted all over Europe!

September brought Louise and Vicki, Ex Ski Peakers, who I had spent 5 months in Vaujany with. Lou and I camped on the southern Tuscan beaches and spent days lying on the sand and swimming in the sea, soaking up the last of the summer rays. And yet again my tour guide skills were put to use as we spent time wandering the streets of Siena, San Gimignano and Castellina.

And finally after months and months of waiting, my Australian best friend arrived with me at the Villa. I found Mel waiting patiently at Florence train station and amongst all the travellers of the day I received the biggest, bestest best friend hug! Mel stayed with me for 8 days in mid-September and our time passed all too quickly, as it does when you’re having too much fun. Unfortunately our 8 days consisted of me having to work solidly at the Villa as our planned trip to the Amalfi Coast went down the drain as did my relationship with an English ski instructor. Mel’s arrival actually couldn’t have been more perfect as having an extra pair of hands to help out meant I didn’t have a nervous breakdown amidst the busiest weeks here at the Villa. What are best friends for anyway, if they can’t be there for you just when you need them! Mel got to experience my new kitchen skills first hand as we cooked for guests 3 nights during her stay and kept my spirits up and my thoughts distracted from the demise of yet another relationship with yet another silly boy! The highlight of our Italian reunion was an amazing afternoon spent at my favourite restaurant in a small town called Lamole. We laboured over amazing Tuscan food for 5 hours and spent most of the time polishing off a bottle of chilled limoncello on the terrace while the waiters flirted and distracted us from the beautiful vista set in front of us!

And now, after 19 months away from family, I am pleased to report that I will have my Dad here with me in a few days! The first family member I have seen since I nervously walked through those dreaded double doors at Melbourne airport in floods of tears and fits of sobbing at leaving my beloved family behind.

Bella Toscana.....Part 10.....Its a Boy!!!

It gives me great pleasure to announce that Verity has given birth to a beautiful little boy. That’s right another boy to complete the trifecta! He arrived on the 12th of October at 11:18am and weighed just 2.94kg. Both little Max Zimbler and Verity are doing great and we are looking forward to bringing them both home in a few days.

Bella Toscana…..Part 9…..A Suitcase full of Memories

“Oh, it’s a hard life!” Living and working in the heart of the Chianti region of Tuscany, with an endless supply of chianti classico vino at my fingertips is such a hard life to lead! But someone has to do it, right? I love the life I have been able to create here amongst the olive trees, gorgeous Italians, the melodic Italian language, the beautiful rolling hills, not to mention the unforgettable food! Life here in Italy is perfect. So why do I find myself deciding to leave?

While I saw this journey through rose tinted glasses last year, I find I have the glasses of reality securely attached to my face this year. Because now everywhere I look is my life. The life that I have been able to create here in Italy. Its all mine, familiar and old to me now. No longer strange, exciting and new.

I now have less than a month left here in Italy with my beloved little family at the Villa. And how sad that feels, except that I have absolutely no time to think about it. As we gear up for our final month of guests here at the villa, a new baby to arrive in less than 3 weeks time and all the preparations which go along with a new born. Have any of us got the luxury of time to sit and think about the changes which we are all about to face! Nope!

And thank god for that because I am certain any such train of sorrowful thoughts would lead me down a path which I know I may not be able to recover from. Each minute I spend with Sam now, each smile and laugh which I extract from his perfect beingness pulls on my heart strings. Every meal I sit down and partake in is just one meal less I won’t have again with my little family here in Italy. The family which embraced me as their own and which I feel as close to as I do my own.

How will I ever be able to forget this place? This place which has given me so much. The Villa, my little herby cottage, Verity, Simon, Sam and Harvey, Italy, Tuscany and an endless list of other magical people and things about this life I have here. How do I forget the place I now know as intimately as any home I have ever lived? Where I know where the best patch of sage grows, where the wild asparagus will sprout from in April and where to look for the August full moon. Which field to watch the fireflies from and where the wild boar like to take their young in Spring. The Villa is imprinted on the back of my hand just as Tuscany is.

The only consolation is the knowledge that this place will haunt me for many months and possibly years to come. I will know what the streets of Siena will feel like as the first Palio of the year is run, what the beautiful rolling hills will look like from month to month. How the grapes will begin to sprout in May and be harvested in September. The sweet broom filling the air as summer approaches and how the first figs on the trees will taste when picked in the August heat.

So as I gear up to pack my suitcase full of memories, with the knowledge that Italy isn’t going anywhere I am trying to console my heart by tricking it into believing that another journey is about to begin which I can only hope will become as rewarding and beautiful as the life I have created here, but secretly I never want anything to be as beautiful as this time here in Italy, my first journey overseas and the place which brought me back to life. It has been perfect beyond words and I always will have those memories with me, forever.

My first writers’ apology

For the first time I am going to make an apology for one of my blog entries. Never before have I allowed myself to post an entry while angered and in the heat of dealing with emotions in my mind. I always allow myself the luxury of hindsight and perspective before I post an entry, but due to my poorly, flu infested, grumpy head earlier this week I wrote out of sheer frustration and I would like to apologise for my little rant about ‘What it is we all want!’

Luckily the flu like symptoms have begun to subside and so too have my thoughts. And now with clearer sinuses and a clearer head I have been able to get some clarification on what it is I actually needed to say. My frustrations came largely from other peoples lives affecting my own. From other peoples indecisions and lack of direction in their own lives which was in effect affecting my own.

And just for the record, I feel I have a pretty good grasp of what it is I want. World peace, good health, love and happiness all top the list, of course! But how I am going to go about achieving all of those aspirations which I hold close to my heart are weighed up whenever I need to make a decision on any great magnitude.

What can I say, I am a planner! Not that any plans actually go according to plan! Call me a control freak! But I do like to have a basic running idea of where I am heading and how I am going to get there. Every decision I make is carefully calculated to get me to where I want to go, to what I want to do or to who I want to be. Which could go a fair way to explaining why those words “I don’t know what it is I want!” being the most off putting words anyone could possibly say to me. Hence my frustrations of late, which I must apologise for.